Imagine your own child laying in bed on a school morning it is 7am, your family start to get up, your child hears the noises everyone makes, and they know what those noises are, Dad going to the bathroom, mum starting to make breakfast, brothers &sisters start getting ready for school, the dog barks wanting to be let out, the house starts to wake up, creaking floors and stairs the natural expansion and contraction of wooden materials, doors opening and closing, the humidity changes in the house, the central heating comes on. Your child is familiar with all these noises and is probably thinking that’s dad getting ready for work and mum making breakfast I have got 15 more minutes then I will have to get up and get ready for school, I think I will just roll over relax and have a doze, hopefully dad takes me to school & I will not have to get the bus.
Now imagine a looked after child on the first morning in your house they will probably have been awake for quite sometime and all of those natural noises which you and your family take for granted can be traumatic and terrifying to a looked after child, with each noise and creak they hear they become more scared, some of the questions that will probably be running through their head could be, when should I get up? what if I don’t like the breakfast? how will I get to school? why is the dog barking it doesn’t know me what if it bites me? what will people think at school when I arrive with someone else? do my teachers know what has happened to me? What are all of those noises, The fear is real, scared, sadness, and confusion all of these emotions come to the surface.
How can you help? Allow your looked after child to process what is happening to them, establish a routine, have a fun conversation that can help calm them down and gives them feelings of positivity then during the relaxing bedtime routine explain what will happen the next morning, ask what their favourite breakfast is, explain the morning routine and what noises they may hear, how they will get to school. Reassurance is very important. And remember what is normal for you and your family can be terrifying for a looked after child.
The Nameless Onion.
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